It is very important for empaths (anyone, really) to be able to distinguish the difference between emotions and feelings. Very simply put, emotions carry energetic signatures of the past and are based in thoughts. Feelings are recognized through the physical body and tell you what is going on for you in the present moment.
Feelings and emotions can both have an effect upon your body and mind. Because they are rooted in some past experience, emotions try to rule your choices by reminding you of consequences and keeping you stuck in your past. Generated by the small self, they are usually triggered by a current dilemma that reminds you of what happened in a similar previous experience. Because they tend to be fear based and can contain other people's energy, emotions are very unreliable and self-limiting.
Feelings are life force energy flowing through you as they register a response within your physical body. Unlike emotions, feelings are yours and yours alone. They are painstakingly honest as they urge you to take a look at what is transpiring for you in the here and now. They are not based on past regrets/experiences nor are they concerned about the future. Therefore, they may encourage you to give up an old belief pattern or shift into a new way of living or viewing life. Feelings give you options and allow you to be in control of what action to take based upon this energetic information they provide.
Emotions are not real-they can and will lie to you. Feelings are real and always tell you the truth, even though you may not like their message or wish it were different.
Chapter 8 of Whose Stuff is This? gives the following exercise that I believe will help you determine whether you are experiencing an emotion or a feeling.
Think about a situation you are currently in. Perhaps you are about to launch into a new business venture, or make a change in residence, or leave/begin a relationship. You probably have at least two choices to make: either go for it or turn away the opportunity-at least for the time being.
Take a deep breath to center your thoughts and become aware of your feelings. Put aside any worry about what will happen in the future, and honestly acknowledge whatever you feel right now. This doesn't mean you will act upon it-just feel it.
As you release the breath, hold the thought that you will accept the opportunity being presented to you.
Now think of the situation again and consider turning away the opportunity. Did you feel an inward shift?
Which consideration made you feel peaceful, happy, or relaxed?
Which consideration made you feel tense, uneasy, or agitated?
Did you hold your breath when considering either thought?
The thought that made you feel relaxed or at ease is your true desire and more than likely the choice you should make.
Sometimes you will get an equal feeling for either option. For example, my husband was "invited" to attend a meeting at work. It was not mandatory and he really didn't want to go, but there were certain expectations of him to be there. He did the above exercise and noticed that one choice did not generate any more feeling than the other. In cases like this, I suggest that you consider yourself first-I know that's not easy for empaths who come from a co-dependent society or family. Decide which choice brings you the least amount of personal stress or inconvenience. If my husband were to attend that meeting I just mentioned, it would put him in the afternoon traffic and take him more than an hour to drive twelve miles home. This would cause him to rearrange or cancel his plans to work out and get some much-needed exercise. If your decision does not have a personal stress factor involved, then consider how others would benefit by your participation and go from there. Make sure that your choices are always aligned with your true feelings/inner guidance and not by your emotions or someone else's neediness.
Experiencing fear when you are considering your options could mean that you are picking up on the energy of another person-perhaps someone is urging you to make a decision that you really don't think is best, but you are afraid of the consequences of disappointing them. Being true to your feelings means making the decision that is best for you and your divine path. If someone is trying to persuade you to be disloyal or is trying to lead you astray by making false promises, the above exercise should help you clarify the intentions of another person. Being honest with yourself means feeling what you feel without judging it to be right or wrong. The more honest you are with yourself, the more you will be able to discern truth and lies in others.
Once you get in touch with a feeling, continue to hold that sensation and get used to how it feels in your body. This is your instructive instinct-spiritual guidance or intuition that you can learn to trust and follow. Intuition and feelings do not come from the rational side of your brain; they come from a place of higher knowing that is meant to guide you even if it means taking risks.
I encourage you to do this exercise often because it will put you more in touch with your body, your feelings, and your internal guidance to help you make decisions from a place of higher understanding without emotional baggage. It will give you courage to go for what you really want in life and trust that everything will work out in perfect and divine timing and order.
Yvonne Perry is the author of Shifting into Purer Consciousness - Integrating Spiritual Transformation with the Human Experience shiftingintopurerconsciousness.com. She holds a bachelor's degree in metaphysics from the American Institute of Holistic Theology and provides personal coaching for spiritual seekers. The host of We Are One in Spirit Podcast, she enjoys speaking about a wide variety of topics to help people realize their own creative power weare1inspirit.com.
Providing useful self development and improvement articles, hynotherapy and counselling writings and other mind help resources online.
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